Testing times

Along with all this fasting lark, last week I had a neurological assessment. For two hours. Try reading the above aloud as quickly as possible, but say the actual colours, not the word.

And that was one of the easy exercises. The rest was something between an English A level and double maths. I had to remember phone numbers which were spoken to me and I had to repeat them, but backwards. Aaagggghhhh!

Although I have to wait for my exam results, the neurologist highlighted my problems with planning, organising and assembling. Yup, the old man could have told them that. I am untidy. At least now I can say it's not untidy, just cognitive impairment.

The solution, I have to 'work through a step-by-step problem-solving strategy.' So crosswords it is then. However, I like the idea that it's my 'executive junctions' which have gone off the rails.



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Ten Fasting days until Christmas

Butternut squash soup with chilli & crème fraîche

Sorry, but its just too cold for salad, so heres an alternative which will warm your cockles as well.

See, on my diets you can cheat and lose weight!

At 264 calories a pop you could have two bowls, I won't tell.

Ingredients

• 1 butternut squash, about 1kg, peeled and deseeded
• 2 tbsp olive oil
• 1 tbsp butter
• 2 onions, diced
• 1 garlic clove, thinly sliced
• 2 mild red chillies, deseeded and finely chopped
• 850ml hot vegetable stock
• 4 tbsp crème fraîche, plus more to serve

Method

Heat oven to 200C/180C fan/gas 6. Cut the squash into large cubes, about 4cm/1½in across, then toss in a large roasting tin with half the olive oil. Roast for 30 mins, turning once during cooking, until golden and soft.

While the squash cooks, melt the butter with the remaining oil in a large saucepan, then add the onions, garlic and ¾ of the chilli. Cover and cook on a very low heat for 15-20 mins until the onions are completely soft.

Tip the squash into the pan, add the stock and the crème fraîche, then whizz with a stick blender until smooth. For a really silky soup, put the soup into a liquidiser and blitz it in batches. Return to the pan, gently reheat, then season to taste. Serve the soup in bowls with swirls of crème fraîche and a scattering of the remaining chopped chilli.

Eleven Fasting days until Christmas

Smoked chicken and mango salad

This mango and chicken dish is an inspired combination. The sweet, luscious mango and herbs really complement the smoked chicken, while the toasted sesame seeds add texture and a nutty flavour.





SERVES 2
Calories per serving: 237
Preparation time: 15 minutes




Finely grated zest and juice of 1⁄2 lime 10 cals
1⁄2 red chilli, deseeded and finely chopped 2-4 cals
2 tsp toasted sesame oil 90 cals
2 tbsp chopped fresh basil leaves 10 cals
2 tbsp chopped fresh mint leaves 10 cals
1 tsp clear honey 20 cals
salt and pepper
1 large little gem or small romaine lettuce, leaves separated 15-25 cals
1 ripe mango, peeled and chopped or sliced
(about 200g flesh) 120 cals
150g smoked chicken, thickly sliced 165 cals
1 tbsp toasted sesame seeds 32 cals

● To make the dressing, whisk together the lime zest and juice with the chilli, sesame oil, basil, mint and honey, then season well with salt and pepper.
● Place the lettuce leaves in a large bowl, add the chopped mango and sliced chicken, pour over the dressing and toss well to coat. Sprinkle with sesame seeds and serve.

There's soup next time, cos you can make a whole heap and freeze some if you want and it is good for inclement weather.





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Twelve (Fasting) Days until Christmas!

Start your fast today, and by Christmas Day you will have lost half a stone! Just two days fasting a week and five 'normal' days. I fast on a Monday and Friday which is easy, infact hardly noticeable. If you want to change a day, no problem but it's easier not to fast on consecutive days.













Hot smoked salmon and watercress linguine

A really luxurious treat for one if you’ve fasted all day and want to savour your calories in a single fast day dinner!


SERVES 1
Calories per serving: 464
Preparation time: 10 minutes
Cooking time: 10 minutes

90g linguine 317 cals
50g watercress 13 cals
grated zest of 1⁄2 lemon and a squeeze of juice 4 cals
2 tbsp natural virtually fat-free fromage frais 15 cals
salt and pepper
50g hot smoked salmon flakes 115 cals

● Cook the linguine in a large pan of boiling salted water according to the packet instructions. Drain (reserving a cupful of the cooking water), return to the pan and set aside.
● Place half the watercress, the lemon zest and a squeeze of juice, and the fromage frais in a small blender. Season with salt and pepper and blend together until smooth.
● Stir the watercress sauce through the cooked linguine, adding a little of the reserved cooking water, as needed,to loosen the sauce. Gently mix in the reserved watercress and the smoked salmon flakes.

This way, you can enjoy Christmas, look and feel better.



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Location:

The Choccywoccydoodah story

Or how my son-in-law's bum ended up in our kitchen in Brighton.
Polly and I have always loved men's bums. So my challenge for their wedding was to give the bride and groom a cake they would always remember, it had to be from Brighton, with a Spanish twist, a bit of humour, include chocolate, be partially gluten free and show a bum...

There was only one place which could help and in Brighton too! Choccywoccydoodah. The best chocolate shop in the world. The plan was hatched just before Christmas with a rough by Dave, the master Choccy chocolatier.
After a tasting meeting with Henry in what can only be described as Willy Wonka's Wedding parlour, surrounded by splendid wedding cakes we agreed on the flavours; Three layers of chocolate sponge, chocolate ganache filling and loads of Belgian chocolate Spanish roses, a beautiful Señorita and a fantastic Matador later, we had us a cunning plan.
It had to be kept a secret, so we even made up a fake cake maker. We told Pol that unfortunately we couldn't afford Choccywoccydoodah. Which was true but hey, how often do you commission this kind of cake? so we had a quiet, inexpensive Christmas, and New Year and Easter, no family holiday...

Even Choccywoccydoodah were great when they knew the cake was a secret apart from when Henry rang and Polly answered the 'phone. I think I told her he was my lover which was fine with her. Not sure Henry would be as convinced... Anyway they arranged delivery to the reception when the happy couple were not around.

To give them their due, Polly and Alex were brilliant about their surprise wedding cake. Given that everything else had been planned, discussed, rowed over, changed, re-arranged, cried about and nearly thrown out of the window, they trusted us magnificently. The mad fools.
And they liked it, they really did. The wedding cake was surrounded by photos of all the grandparents at their weddings which was lovely.

Once the cake was devoured, no one could bring themselves to eat either Polly or Alex which is how come they both ended up in our kitchen. And they are very happy, even if they are on the shelf.



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Pumpkins squashed by the weather

Slindon Pumpkin Festival
It was too soggy today but next week we are visiting the pumpkin farm, even without children, it is a very important tradition.

Every year in the month of October, the sleepy West Sussex village of Slindon holds a seasonal display of hundreds of pumpkins, squashes and gourds. Now in its 44th straight year, the display attracts tourists from as far as Germany, Japan and Australia.

The tradition began in 1968 when Ralph Upton placed his yearly crop of pumpkins on his shed to ripen. The display attracted the eyeballs of the village folk. The next year he tried again, using the roof of his wooden shed as a canvas on which he created a mural with his harvest. Since then the display has been growing larger and more complicated. Each year there is new theme - the Universe, the Pyramids and the Rialto Bridge in Venice. Using helpers Ralph Upton used pumpkins to create boats, butterflies, witches, Noah's Ark and even dinosaurs.

"I can't paint pictures, but I can paint with pumpkins," says Upton. "Originally, we began lining pumpkins along the roof to cure the skins because they don't keep unless they're exposed to the sun. Gradually we worked out patterns and people have come to expect it."

Since the 1950s until his death in 2009, Ralph Upton was growing pumpkins, squashes and gourds in his six-acre plot and planted a staggering 15,000 to 20,000 seeds each spring to produce an organic harvest of more than 50 varieties. He was once nick-named The Pumpkin King - a title he truly deserved.

A beet of greet

If you haven't got a friendly doctor on hand then there is an alternative.

It costs nothing, as long as you give it back to the owner. And I haven't gone loopy! honest.

What you need to do is borrow a gold ring. Rub the ring on your CLOSED eye and the cure is instant.

I haven't a clue why it works but it does.


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Pig, it's a stye

It only hurts when I blink.


The only treatment for a stye is application of warm compresses apparently according to three pharmacists. I thought I had left my teenage years long ago. (You did. Ed) So this is self-care at home, you cleanse the affected eyelid with tap water or with a mild, non-irritating soap or shampoo (such as baby shampoo) to help clean crusted discharge. Cleansing must be done gently and while the eyes are closed to prevent eye injuries. Why do I never read the whole thing? I've just burnt my eye ball. And here's the good news, if a stye bursts, care must be taken to cleanse the wound to prevent reinfection.

You are highly advised not to lance the stye, as serious infection can occur as a result. The infection could spread to the surrounding tissues and areas.

So I'll put away the lance.

Eye stye sufferers should avoid eye makeup (e.g., eyeliner), lotions, and wearing contact lenses, since these can aggravate and spread the infection (sometimes to the cornea).

I've got to throw away all my eye makeup. And I'm ignoring the next paragraph.

Surgery is the last resort in stye treatment. Styes that do not respond to any type of therapies are usually surgically removed. Stye surgery is performed by an ophthalmologist and generally under local anaesthesia. The procedure consists of making a small incision on the inner or outer surface of the eyelid, depending if the stye is pointing externally or not. After the incision is made, the pus is drained out of the gland, and very small and unnoticeable sutures are used to close the lesion. It is common for the removed stye to be sent for histopathological examination to rule out the possibility of skin cancer.

Who knew?




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£188.23

and the winner of the Macmillan great British bake off was Joy with her Nigella buns.

How appropriate.


Trevor and Alexa were just too busy eating...


Joy's Nigella buns on the left. And this was the calm before the noshing.


And Glynn was gambling his beans away just before he and Alexa fell out of the photo. We all had a great time and are now thinking of the next fundraiser.

Many thanks to all who came along, ate, drank and were merry and helped fund good old Macmillan.

9lbs lost so far.

Sometimes it seems like all good authors come from Brighton, they may well do, and here's another one, Mimi Spencer.

When Dr Michael Mosley (an overweight diabetic) filmed his ideas and experiences about fasting last year there was little idea about the impact the film would have. When I featured his findings on my blog, it turned out to be the most popular blog I had ever written. I promised myself I would try the fast diet but didn't. It was only when a very good (skinny) friend dropped his book through my letterbox a couple of months ago that I ran out of excuses.

I have unfortunately been mostly inactive for the last two years and as a result the weight has piled on, about a stone a year. It made no sense for my health or happiness to continue in this way. Cancer likes fat, MS likes fat, DVT's like fat and coating my internal organs with it also makes no sense. Although I swim twice a week and exercise as well, it's not enough to shift the pounds.

Then a couple of months ago I saw 'the fast diet recipe book' at my skinny friends house. It's a great book for the two days a week when you fast. You obviously can still eat something on those days (about 500 calories) it's just important to have nutritious food which is well balanced and the book includes recipes which are delicious. The old man took some convincing but when he could see that the weight loss was making me feel and look better, he started to look at the recipes and stopped scoffing.

Today is fast day and I'm having chicken Puttanesca for my supper.





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